Sunday, March 23, 2008

Scrapbooking Laws (We Hope Get Passed)

Our guest blogger today is Nicole P. Wait until you read her great scrapbooking laws!

My friends and I recently compiled a list of hopeful Scrapbooking Laws. We are planning to storm Capitol Hill soon and demand that they ALL be put into effect.
1. The Golden Rule of Scrapbooking should be printed on every Scrap Studio wall: A layout a day keeps the blues away.
2. Friends never let friends buy ugly paper.
3. It is illegal to attend a crop and NOT buy at least one item from a vendor.
4. Duct tape should not be a scrapbooker's primary source of adhesive on layouts.
5. It is illegal to use fabric scissors on paper, paper scissors on chipboard, and anything other than Titanium scissors on metal. It is however, permissible, to use that first pair of scrapbooking scissors that weren't really that great in the first place on anything because they are right there and all the others are buried under the pile of junk on your scrapbook desk.
6. Eyelets should NEVER be hammer-set within two feet of an opened container of brads unless the surface upon which the eyelet is being set just happens to be a four-foot thick slab of concrete and thus will not bounce the brads onto the floor.
7. It is illegal to cut buttons in half at a crop. This is a public safety ordinance.
8. The giver of a RAK (Random Act of Kindness) or seller of scrapbook items on Ebay is herewith ordered to purchase additional scrapbook supplies in an amount that is equal to or greater than twice the amount given or sold.
9. Several "hiding" places that the husband is not aware of must me present in the residence of all scrapbookers so unauthorized purchases can be safely stashed until the opportune time.
10. Children must submit written request, in triplicate, specifying exactly which paper they would like to take from a scrapbooker's supply. The scrapbooker addressed then has 48 hours to render a reply to said request. Any child found using one of their scrapbooking mom's "favorite" pieces of paper will be found guilty of theft and sentenced to two month's of laundry services for the Duggar family.
11. No one or nothing should interrupt a scrapper during a crop or scrapping binge.... Just do it yourself.
12. Any and all items within the 4 walls of any scrapbooker’s residence are subject to confiscation by the scrapbooker to be used as scrapbooking supply storage.
13. If a husband wishes to borrow a scrapbooking tool from his wife, the tool must be used properly in the presence of the wife and returned promptly.
14. If a wife borrows a tool of her husband's for scrapbooking purposes, possession is 9/10 of the law, and it becomes hers automatically.
15. Husbands who borrow their wives scrapbook tools without consent or supervision and do not return thus said scrapbook tool to its designated location in the exact condition as it was removed shall be fined no less than double the retail value of said disturbed scrapbook tool.
16. When a scrapbooker’s husband becomes aware of any unpleasant bodily odors emitting from the scrapbooker due to a massive paper-crafting binge, the husband is under no circumstances permitted to comment.
17. Husbands are forbidden from ever giving scrapbooking advice unless the husband
A. Has a college degree in art/design
B. Has a natural gift for art/design AND most importantly
C. Was asked for his advice.
The penalty for violations shall be the forced surrender of his Master Card.
18. No husband, under penalty of death or dismemberment, shall attempt to remove any Michael's ad from the paper and hide it from the wife.
19. Husbands should never make fun of any Carol Duvall episode, even if she says, "You Scrapbookers" and points her finger at the TV screen. It is okay for Carol to do this, but husbands are never allowed to do this unless they want that finger smashed in a Sizzix machine.
20. When shown a completed layout, husbands must respond with a minimum of three (3) acceptable comments, heretoforth known as "compliments", including but not limited to:"Your talent never ceases to amaze me.""Now THAT one will get you published!""Hold on. I've got to call the guys and tell them about this one!"
21. It is illegal for any husband to ever say, "My wife's a scrapbooker" whilst rolling his eyes.
22. Most importantly, take pride in your creations and always remember to have fun!

Contributed to, compiled, and edited by Nicole P. at
A special thanks to the members of the All Moments Remembered Message Board for contributing to this post.

I have so enjoyed being your guest blogger today. A huge thanks to the members of Killer Hobbies for inviting me!


Nicole P said...

I am not sure how to comment on my own post....Great job Nicole!!

And Thank you Joanna for asking me to be a guest here at your KILLER blog!

Anonymous said...

Oh my... smiling ear to ear. I'm loving the 3 compliment rule. So much better than the "Oh, that's nice honey" whilest straining over your shoulder to see the tv.

PattiM said...

Love the rules.... Its great seeing them... We have so much fun making up rules.....Some of them are hilarious..... You did an awesome job, Nicole!!! Whoooo Hooooo, for Nicole.....


Anonymous said...

WTG to the AMR gals...aren't those a hoot...Luv that LO Nicole...Great job...

Born2scrap said...

Way to go Nicole!!! Great Job!

Toot Toot AMR Girls!

Jackie said...

Great Job Nicole and AMR girls.Fun as always:)

Anonymous said...

So cool to see these posted!!

Samantha said...

Great list!! I agree with all these laws/rules!! WTG, Nicole!!

Kay said...

Oh these are sooooo going up on my wall!! LOL Too funny! GReat job Nicole!

Jenn said...

Great job Nicole! Love the rules!

Jingle said...

Yup! That would be us! Thanks for featuring Nicole and our awesome list of laws!!!

Anonymous said...

WTG Nicole!

Ron said...

BRAVO Nicole!

As did a FABU job!!!

clap, clap, clap...applause, applause, applause....

"No autographs, please...just throw money!"

tee, hee!

Anonymous said...

Nicole, these are great. I just learned a little more about how passionate you are about scrapbooking. Writing must be another one of your passions. I'm impressed!

Joanna Campbell Slan said...

Aren't these super? Nicole, thanks so much. I laughed and laughed as I posted them.

I especially liked the one about cutting a button. That's about as safe as running with scissors, eh? And as for the compliment...does anyone here speak "grunt"?

I often get "UGH" as a response to "see what I just did." I guess my super-smart husband runs out of appropriate adjectives when it comes to scrapbook pages.

Camille Minichino said...

My fave in the post is the killer life-size scrapbooking page!
thanks Nicole and thanks Joanna for sharing her.

Morriskats said...

So cute! "You scrapbookers" (pointing finger) are hilarious! I'm not into it but I admire the hardwork and creativity it takes.

Elizabeth said...

WTG Nicole!!! The list turned out great!! Whoo hoo!!

All moments remembered said...

Those are rules we all should live by!! Nicole you are wonderful and your writings always make me smile!! My hubby really use to hide the Mikes adds from me. I could have him arrested with these set of rules!!

Judylynn said...

Thanks, Nicole! I can identify with most of these laws. My hubby loves to keep the Hobby Lobby ad away from me. He's pretty supportive, though (since he's figured out I'd do it anyway!).

Jen said...

You AMR girls did an awesome job on those. Some of them had me laughing sooo hard!!! WTG Nicole!!! :)

Sandy/tx-nana-scraps said...

So coooool Nicole. :-)

Rachel said...

Yeah for NICOLE!!!

Thanks for the smiles and chuckles :}

Ida said...

LOVE THE RULES!! WTG Nicole! Do you think you could get my family to just READ them????